The Trouble with Character Polls
by Gigai-Gurl
Summary: Gintoki and Otae had a big fight over the results of a character poll. How will these two get over such a major misunderstanding? And no, it's not about who's on top. So get your mind off the gutter ne. NEW CHAPTER 7 is UP!
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Hello, minna. I'm back to Fanfiction-ing to mess with your minds...erm...scratch that...what I meant was to give you another torture...gah!...another Gintoki x Otae STORY. Yes, ANOTHER STORY for this pairing. I know, I know, I haven't updated "I am Drinking the Stars" yet. So sorry about that. But oh wait, I think I have the new chapter of that already typed on my computer and getting ready to go...maybe I should upload that now. *fu-fu-fu* ;-) Anyway, enough of my fooling around. Thank you very much for supporting this pairing. And for taking the time to read my stories. I really, really appreciate it. (((GLOMPS)))**  
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Gintama is copyrighted by Hideaki Sorachi. I make no claims of owning it.

* * *

**The Trouble With Character Polls**

* * *

'Who the hell was that?' he thought out loud as the people who looked vaguely familiar ran past him. There was the woman with the pony tail and the man with the silver hair, he thought he saw both of them before but their faces were unrecognizable.

He gave up trying to remember and chalked it up to the evening sake he just had and shook his head vigorously. "That sake packs a punch. It made my eyes play tricks on me."

"Ara, that was strange," he heard a female voice said. He blinked and saw Otae looking in the direction he was looking earlier when those people ran by.

"Yo, Otae-san," he called her attention as the young woman stood there with a bewildered look on her face.

"Oh hi, Gin-san," she said. "Did you see that? I think I saw a person that looks just like you and wearing the same clothes like you with a woman who had the same hairstyle as me ran by while holding hands and giggling. And then, there was a real gorilla running after them with an onion stalk stuck on his back. And another guy with a scar..."

"Ah those people. Don't mind them. They're probably some cosplayers from an anime convention who are just out and about having a good time. They do that you know. They parade around downtown with their costumes on, scaring the hell out of the locals," he said, trying to sound nonchalant.

"I see," she said thoughtfully. "That's really weird."

For a minute or two there was an awkward silence between them until Gintoki decided to speak first. He was afraid Otae would pursue the subject further. He wasn't in the mood to deal with ugly cosplayers.

"Um, you're on your way home early," he asked casually, looking away and scratching his head.

"Yes, it's a slow night at Snack Sumairu, so the manager allowed us to go home early tonight," she said, smiling.

"Well it's not payday yet so all the middle-aged salary men have no money to go drinking Dom Peri and pinching your bony ass...UGH!" It was too late when he realized the words that came out of his mouth. Otae had already given him an elbow on the stomach. He felt like throwing up all the food he ate that day.

"I mean, yeah, you should go home early during a slow night so you can have your full 8 hours of beauty sleep," he choked.

"What about you? You seemed to have just come out of a bar," Otae remarked, choosing to ignore Gintoki's last ditch effort to make amends.

"No, I just had a few drinks in this restaurant. You know, unwinding after a hard day's work," he replied.

"A hard day's work huh? I wonder what's so hard about NOT working all day?" she said, thoroughly perplexed.

"Hey! I resent that," he said defensively. "I'll have you know that I work hard to keep my business going and yes, every day takes a toll on me. So I need a little reward for myself."

"Is that so? I wonder when you're going to reward Shin-chan and Kagura-chan for their hard day's work?" she quipped while looking at Gintoki with an eyebrow raised.

"Um...er...that's..." he stammered and then sighed. "There's no winning an argument with you." He felt his head reeling. The damn sake did him in again.

"Ara, who said we're arguing? I was just making a comment," Otae replied playfully. "Well it's a good thing you're not too drunk yet," she said.

"Of course, I know how to hold my liquor, unlike some people I know," he snickered quietly. Otae shot him a killer glance but turned to go. She was in no mood to hurt people tonight. It was cold yet the image of the shining moon up in the sky was so beautiful. She would really hate ruining it with blood and violence.

"Um, you want me to walk you home?" Gintoki asked suddenly like it was the most natural thing to say next. After a few seconds, he realized what he just said and it dawned on him that it was completely out of his character. And he knew that Otae knows it, too.

"That's alright. I know my way home," she chuckled, trying not to show that she was visibly taken off guard. She felt flustered for a moment but realized those words came from Gintoki. Flattery was quickly replaced by suspicion then quickly replaced by amusement. She resisted the urge to laugh. 'Maybe he's just afraid to walk by himself and needed me to protect him,' she thought.

On the other hand, Gintoki felt a growing discomfort. He was beginning to think it was a bad idea to ask something like that of Otae. She is a perfectly capable young woman, after all. She could definitely take care of herself. So why did he had to voice his worry. He mentally scolded himself and struggled to regain his composure.

"Baka! What I meant was I'll walk with you, we're going in the same direction anyway," he said, not waiting for Otae to reply. He went a little ahead of her, trying so hard to act normal and uncaring.

"Oh...alright then," Otae said, a bit puzzled about his change of demeanor. She felt a tinge of disappointment but dismissed it. She knew Gintoki wouldn't do something out of his nature and it was not in his nature to be walking a girl home. 'He is definitely scared to walk alone,' she concluded.

They walked in silence for a few minutes. Gintoki stole a glance in her direction. She looked a bit pensive and he wondered what she was thinking. 'Maybe I should say something that would make her laugh,' he said to himself. 'Nah, I'm not good at that. Maybe say something silly. Nah, I'm not good at that either. Hmm...I could make fun of her. Yeah, that one I'm good at. Wait, that would just give me pain. Nah, that's never a good idea.'

"Um, Gin-san, omedetou," said Otae without looking at him.

"Huh? What was that for?" he asked, stopping to face her.

"Ah, that's for being the number 1 most popular character in Gintama," she said. "You've become so popular these days ne."

"Oh that! Thanks," he said, his pride welling up. "Of course, I should be Number 1, I'm the main character after all. I mean, it would be too shameful to not be the popular one when you're the main character. Look at Bleach, Ichigo has been surpassed quite a few times by another supporting character. That's bad for the series."

Otae smiled and nodded in agreement. But Gintoki felt that pensiveness in her eyes again.

"How about you? What rank are you?" he dared to ask.

Otae sighed. She didn't want to discuss the character poll with Gintoki but she was the one who mentioned it first. So there was the risk that he'd ask about her ranking in their conversation. She now regretted having to congratulate him for it just for the sake of making casual conversation.

"I'm 16th and I'm even surpassed by two gorillas," she said rather shamefully. "I can't believe that two gorillas are more popular than I am. Seriously, I am a bit mad about it. I did plan to get rid of those gorillas and take their spot. And then take it up to the source, the mangaka himself...but...argh!" She let her frustration out into the darkness. Her eyes glistening in the moonlight.

"Ma...ma...don't worry about it. It's just some silly character poll, you know," Gintoki tried to console her. "It's nothing to be serious about. The rankings change everyday. I mean, hell, my spot as Number 1 is not really assured. It might go to Sougo next time if he ever do something really cool like successfully getting rid of Hijikata for real. Yeah, you know, people like those sort of violent things. Hehe."

"I guess, you're right. I shouldn't be thinking about it anymore," said Otae. She walked ahead of him without another word and Gintoki was relieved. 'So that's what's on her mind,' he thought.

"Um, that Tsukuyo girl is in the top ten," Otae said it loud enough for him to hear. "She's really cute. I heard you know her well."

"Oh, her. Yeah, we did some work for the Yoshiwara and helped them out a bit," he said casually but carefully.

"It seems that she is a really good shinobi. Shin-chan said she is really skillful and strong," Otae said.

"You could say that again," he said, remembering Tsukuyo's supplex and fist on his jaw. But Otae didn't hear any of it.

"I heard that you saved her from her really bad sensei," she said.

"Oh, that. I just happened to be there and I couldn't stand by and watch things go down like that," he said. He was beginning to wonder where this conversation was heading. 'Why is Otae so interested in Tsukuyo?' he thought.

"Ah..." Otae agreed still without looking at him. "You always protect what's in front of you."

Gintoki stopped walking and looked at her steadily. Her ponytail and kimono swayed in the night breeze. She walked with a quiet dignity and he just noticed it.

Otae felt that Gintoki wasn't near and decided to stop and turn around. She saw Gintoki gazing at her intently. When Gintoki became aware that she was looking at him. He felt embarrassed and tried to do something else. He looked away and pretended to pick his nose.

"You're disgusting," he heard Otae said and she continued walking. He heaved a sigh of relief and walked on.

"I also heard that you get to feel Tsukuyo's boob twice," Otae said nonchalantly.

"What? That was...I didn't..." he stammered. "That wasn't on purpose. On one occasion, a spider landed on my hand. And the other, I was holding out my hand without really looking where it landed."

"Hmm," Otae nodded and looked at him slyly. "A spider huh? And not having control over your own hand? Yeah right."

"Well I admit...it was a bit squishy and soft," he said looking at his hand. "AGH!" Otae just gave him a quick flying kick on the face.

"I don't care how squishy and soft it was you perverted samurai. You're really hopeless."

"Hey! What was that for?" He shouted, picking himself up. "You're the one who brought it up. Besides, I can't help these things, I'm a man. Men do those kinds of things. Geesh..."

Otae looked at him intently and he thought she would murder him. But instead she set her kimono straight and continued walking.

"You two would make a good couple," she said inaudibly.

"What was that?" Gintoki asked.

Otae didn't answer but Gintoki persisted. "Oi, if you got something to say, say it out loud, will you?"

"I said, you two would make a good couple," she said clearly.

"You mean me and Tsukuyo?" he asked, still confused from the kick he received.

"No you and Kondo-gorilla," Otae sounded irritated. "Yes, you and her. You're number 1 and she's number 9. You're both popular so what else is there? I mean, she has her own story arc, she's in one whole volume of the manga. She gets to be a damsel in distress and you, the main character, gets to save her, Isn't that a good formula for the series. She's strong, intelligent, she has big breasts, she's popular with the readers, she can actually be the heroine of Gintama, right? As for me I'm just a side character. I'm a comedic relief. The requisite flat chested tsundere who's even less popular than two gorillas!"

Otae knew she wasn't making any sense but she was already too caught up with her frustration about the character poll and of the knowledge that a certain girl had received Gintoki's attention. She knew she shouldn't really care. She shouldn't concern herself about Gintoki's involvement with other women. But there it was, she just blurted out her irritation. And she didn't even know why she was saying those things but she felt she had to let it all out regardless of the consequences.

"Is that what this is all about?" asked Gintoki, trying to wrap his head around her logic. Try as he might he just couldn't understand why she was acting this way all of a sudden. "The character poll? I told you it's not something you should take seriously. Who knows, the mangaka himself may have just padded the result or completely made the whole thing up."

She said some ridiculous things that made him extremely annoyed at her. And when he was annoyed, his bitter sarcasm usually followed. "But I'll tell you this, if you really want to become popular, maybe you should stop being a pain in the ass once in a while and be good at cooking tamagoyaki for once and maybe show more of your feminine side. Hey I know, how about getting a boob job done to get rid of your flat chest, and perhaps some..."

Gintoki stopped in the middle of his rant when he saw Otae looking at him, unsmiling. He felt a tinge of guilt and shame for what he said.

"Ah sou..." she said, her voice even and devoid of emotion. "Maybe you're right. You're the popular main character, after all."

Both of them didn't notice that they were already by the gate of the Kudokan dojo. Otae walked towards the gate and opened it without a word.

"Hey about all that I said...I didn't mean..." Gintoki said, trying to sound apologetic.

"Well thank you for walking me home, Sakata-san. That was nice of you. Good night," said Otae with a big smile on her face as she bowed her head reverently.

"Oi did you hear me..." asked Gintoki. But Otae already closed the door silently behind her.

_To be continued..._


	2. Chapter 2

Gintoki waited outside for a few minutes as he ran his hand in his silver hair. "Tch...I think I went way overboard this time. Shit, why did I let my mouth run off like that." He knew he said some awful things that hurt Otae. She didn't show it, but he knew she was hurt. He had the strong urge to knock on the gate and apologize to her but he thought better of it. 'I'll tell her tomorrow,' he said to himself. He walked toward the _Yorozuya_ headquarters with a heavy heart in his chest.

Meanwhile, Otae was still there leaning on the gate. She was trying hard to hold back her tears of frustration and anger. She gripped her fists tighter. But a persistent sob escaped from her lips. She placed an arm over her eyes and rubbed them vigorously. 'How dare he? Just because he's ranked number 1 doesn't mean he could be as brutally frank and insulting like that. He didn't even consider how I would feel? Gin-san _baka_!' Then her face went bleak and she said, 'Well I guess he was right. I'm trying too hard to be an interesting character but actually, I'm just forgettable and unlikable because of those flaws he mentioned.'

She walked towards the dojo with a heavy heart. It dawned on her that Gintoki really saw her as an annoying character.

* * *

At the _Yorozuya_ headquarters...

Gintoki's conscience wouldn't let him sleep this off easily. It wasn't like he was the one who started it, he said to himself. She brought it upon herself. He admitted that he got irritated by how she let the character poll affect her that much to the point of being nonsensical. And what was up with that Tsukuyo and him getting together? Was she crazy? He would not hookup with a dangerous girl like that, perfect breasts or not. Was she actually jealous of Tsukuyo for getting an arc of her own and appearing in one volume? Well, she had the Kyubei arc, what more could she ask for?

'Tch...that woman is giving me a serious headache,' he said staring up the ceiling.

The next day was a slow day for the _Yorozuyas_. Kagura was helping Otose and Catherine cleanup the bar downstairs, while Shinpachi went back home to help out his sister on some grocery shopping. Gintoki was left at the headquarters, reading Jump comics as usual.

But he was having a hard time concentrating on the stories. He flipped at the pages of comics irritably.

"Argh! I can't even get past this one story, damn it," he shouted as he abruptly sat up on the couch. "Why do people have consciences? It's just so damn troublesome."

He got up and went to the fridge. He took a swig of his last box of strawberry milk and found that it was already way past its expiration date. "Uwa..that's nasty." He threw the box in the trash can and opened the fridge again. "It looks like I have to get some strawberry milk today. Well, it can't be helped."

He was really planning to get out and go to the _Kudokan_ dojo to apologize to Otae. But he was a bit scared of what her reaction would be so he delayed going there as much as he could. He'd rather face off a herd of raging bulls than face the wrath of Otae. But what really worried him the most was her not reacting like she would normally do and just face him with a fake smile on her face. If that happens, he wouldn't know what to do. So he had to make amends quickly. And it looked like he would get the chance to do it, now that he had no choice but to go out. Maybe he'll eat something sweet first to calm his nerves, he thought. "Yeah, that would help a lot."

Meanwhile, Shinpachi and Otae were at the marketplace, doing some grocery shopping. It took Shinpachi almost an hour to get his sister out of the _dojo_ for some reason. 'It felt like she doesn't want to go out at all,' he thought. 'She's been making too much fuss about doing the chores that needed to be done in the _dojo_ first before doing the groceries.'

"_Aneue_, the laundry and the dishes can wait. We don't have food supplies. At this rate, we'll starve to death if we don't get something edible to eat," he said.

"Oh don't be so melodramatic, Shin-chan. It's just food, we can always have ramen delivered," Otae said, as she put away the dishes. "Besides, the chores are important, too. Our _dojo_ may be rundown but we have to keep it clean and dignified."

Shinpachi knew that when his older sister gets into this mode, the grocery shopping won't be done anytime soon. He had to think of a very good reason to get her out the door.

"Um, _Aneue_, I checked the fridge earlier and we've got no more Bargain Dash left. Yup, not even a single cup. There's definitely no Bargain Dash in there. Zero, nada, zilch," he said nonchalantly. "I guess, you won't get to eat any Bargain Dash today..."

"What? Why didn't you say so? We should go out and get some and do the groceries too since we're out already," she said, suddenly all dressed up and ready to go.

Shinpachi silently thanked his lucky Bargain Dash that his plan worked.

* * *

Out in the marketplace...

Gintoki was walking towards the convenience store when he saw Shinpachi standing by its entrance. He hesitated in his steps. He knew Otae would be close by and he hadn't even rehearsed what he was going to say. He didn't want to screw up his apology. Not after he had said those harsh things to her last night. He felt the urgent need to do it right the first time as a painful twinge tugged at his heart. 'Damn guilt!' he muttered. He mustered all his courage, tried to looked casual and walked ahead.

"Yo _pattsan_," he called Shinpachi's attention.

"Ah Gin-san. So you've finally decided to get out of the house," Shinpachi said.

'Well yeah, we don't have any strawberry milk so I need to replenish our supply," he said, roving his eyes slyly to search for Otae's location.

"Don't talk like Kagura-chan and I drink strawberry milk. That's all for you. You're the only _ichigo gyuunyuu_ guy around here," Shipanchi said.

"Um, I thought you were with your sister doing some grocery shopping," he asked casually and forgetting Shinpachi's comment.

"Yeah. _Aneue_ is inside and getting her supply of Bargain Dash," Shinpachi said. "You'll see her on the frozen section oh-ing and ah-ing at the different Bargain Dash flavors much like a kid inside a candy store."

Gintoki decided to get both his apology and his shopping over with at the same time. The chance was hard to pass up. He could even volunteer to buy her a whole carton of Bargain Dash to add to his apology. So he thought up a plan - he would just casually walk up to her and say his apologies and offer to buy her the Bargain Dash she liked the most, then get his supply of strawberry milk and head on home. He liked it - it was plain, simple and straightforward. No need to get into another awkward situation with Otae especially when she might still be mad about his insults last night.

He stepped inside the convenience store. His eyes roamed the aisles but he knew where he was headed - the frozen section. It was where cold ichigo gyuunyuu were placed anyway. So he braced himself and walked purposefully towards the milk section while trying hard to look ahead. He opened a fridge and reached for some cartons of strawberry milk. He sneakily looked to his left where the ice cream section was and found there was nobody there.

He scratched his head and looked at the cashier's counter to see if there was somebody there. But it looked like Otae was nowhere to be found. He knotted his brows. 'What? I got so worked up for nothing..."

He hauled his strawberry milk to the counter and looked out where Shinpachi was. He saw the young man looked surprised, called out to someone and broke into a run.

"Do you want a bag for these?" the cashier asked.

"Huh?" he answered, obviously distracted.

"I said do you want a bag?" the cashier repeated.

"Ah yeah," he said and absently grabbed the bag from the cashier and hurriedly walked to the exit.

Outside, he saw no sign of Shinpachi or Otae anywhere. "That's suspicious," he muttered. He decided to go back to the _Yorozuya_ HQ, feeling a bit disappointed for not meeting Otae there and getting his chance to apologize to her. It looked like he had no choice but to go to Kudokan dojo and properly apologize to her.

_To be continued..._


	3. Chapter 3

After Otae decided what flavors of Bargain Dash she was going to get, she felt a bit better. She was even excited to try out the new limited flavors. She happily took her ice cream to the cashier. She looked to see how Shinpachi was doing and that was when she spotted Gintoki. A welling of irritation and anger suddenly rose inside her. She had the urge to go out there and beat the crap out of Gintoki as payback for his insults last night. She could already feel a vein popping on her forehead.

'Now, now, you musn't get all worked up,' she whispered to herself. 'Eventhough, you wanted so badly to kick his ass right now, you mustn't lose control because he'll just expect that from you. No, you must try to be calm and just think that he doesn't exist at all. Yes, that's a good idea, think that he doesn't exist anymore. Make him a stranger you won't ever meet. Yes, that's good. A stranger who you don't want to know ever because he's the biggest jerk in this planet.'

She smiled at the cashier and asked sweetly, "Um, do you mind if I use your back door to get out of here?"

The cashier looked at her in puzzlement. "Well, you see that man over there - the one with the silver hair. He's been stalking me in the marketplace earlier and I'm just so scared of him. You would really do me a big favor if you let me leave through the back door, I just don't want him to see me," she explained. She made sure that her face had that desperate and pleading look. "_Onegai!_"

"Yeah...sure...why not," said the cashier, taking pity on her.

She beamed her sweetest smile to the cashier and walked out of the store through the back door. Now she would have to call Shinpachi's attention without having to go to the front of the convenience store. She peaked from the side of the store - Gintoki and Shinpachi were still talking. She waited a few seconds and then looked again. She saw Gintoki going inside the store. Now was her chance. She quickly called out to Shinpachi.

"Shin-chan, Shin-chan," as she waved him to come over to where she was.

Shinpachi looked at her with surprise and ran towards her. "_Aneue!_ How did you get here? I thought you were still inside the store."

"Well I asked the cashier if they still have other flavors of Bargain Dash in the back. He said there were some so I checked it out. There were definitely limited edition flavors but none appealed to me so I didn't get any. And since I was at the back, I decided to just go out through the back door. It's such a hassle to be walking over the front door to get out you know. It was quicker this way," she said.

"But Gin-san was just there and asked about you," he looked back.

"Who?" she feigned ignorance but didn't let Shinpachi answer anymore. "Anyway, let's go home. I'm starving. I'll let you cook this time. So you better make me a delicious meal. Come on, hurry up," she said as she dragged Shinpachi hurriedly.

"Alright, alright. I'm coming. Gee, are you THAT hungry?" said Shinpachi. But Otae didn't reply.

* * *

Gintoki was in a bad mood. Not only did he fail to get the apology thing with Otae done and over with, now he had to put up with his guilty feeling for a little longer. "Why am I feeling this way, damn it? It wasn't my fault. She started it. She got what she deserved," he said out loud, clearly frustrated. "Yeah, that's right. Maybe I shouldn't apologize at all. Yeah, I'm the man. Men don't apologize. We have our pride! Women should just cry and take it."

"Gin-chan, my papi said that if you did something that hurt another person you should tell that person you're sorry. Unless you really meant to hurt that person, yes? In that case, you are the biggest jerk in this whole wide world and I am ashamed to be your friend," Kagura said while reading Jump comics on the couch.

"Huh? Kagura! I didn't know you are here," said Gintoki, a bit embarrassed.

"I was here all the time and I heard everything you were telling yourself," answered Kagura, still not taking her eyes off the pages of Jump comics.

"_Ah souka_," he said and went to the fridge and placed the cartons of strawberry milk he bought from the grocery store. He was mulling over what Kagura told him.

"Gin-chan, did you really mean to hurt the feelings of that person?" This time Kagura put down the comics and looked directly at him. He avoided her gaze. "Cause if you didn't mean it then you should say sorry right away. Or else things would just get worse."

He sighed and said, "Kagura, are you hungry? It's already lunchtime. Do you want to go to Shinpachi's and get some free food?"

"But _Anego_ might be cooking her _tamagoyaki_ again," Kagura-san said in horror.

"Nah, I have a feeling that Shinpanchi is cooking _nabe_ for his beloved sister," he said, grinning. Even if he wasn't and Otae cooked her signature _tamagoyaki_ meal, Gintoki would readily eat it without complaint if it would help with smoothing things out with her. Truth be told, he really didn't want to let this misunderstanding between them go on long. He really wanted to apologize to her sincerely.

_To be continued..._


	4. Chapter 4

At the _Kudokan dojo_, the Shimura siblings were preparing for lunch.

"_Aneue_, the _nabe_ is almost done," Shinpanchi called out to his sister, who was in the kitchen.

"Oh my, Shin-chan, you've outdone yourself again," said Otae as she brought in rice bowls and chopsticks. "It looks and smells so good. Let's eat."

"_Hai_," said Shinpanchi, beaming with pride. "After you, _Aneue_."

Just then, there was a loud knock on the _dojo_ gate. "_Ara_, I wonder who could that be at this time of the day?" wondered Otae.

"I'll get it, _Aneue_," said Shinpachi hurriedly. He had a feeling he knew who their visitors are when he opened the gate. "Gee nice timing you two. I bet you smelled my _nabe_ miles away," he whispered annoyingly as he stood by the _dojo_ gate.

"_Yo, pattsan_," said Gintoki smiling widely. "Er, Kagura and I were taking Sadaharu for a walk and we looked at the time and what do you know, it's lunch time. And you know, we were in the neighborhood so we thought we'd drop by and say hi ... "

"Shinpachi, we smelled your _nabe_ miles away and so we went here to get some free food," said Kagura walking past him.

"Thank you, Kagura-chan," said Shinpachi. "At least one of you is honest enough to admit that you're only here for the free food." He raised an eyebrow at Gintoki. "Maybe we should just leave Gin-san out here since he just wanted to say hi and all that," said Shinpachi.

"Fine by me. That would only mean more_ nabe_ for me," said Kagura without emotion.

"_Teme_, don't gang up on a starving man," said Gintoki. "Yes, I want free food, too. Are you two happy now?"

"Took you long enough to admit it," said Shinpachi as he led them to the dining area. "_Aneue_, we have two freeloaders here who's going to eat our nabe with us."

Gintoki felt his heart beating nervously. This is the first time he was going to see Otae after what happened last night and he didn't know what her reaction would be if she saw him. He didn't even know how to face her. 'Come on, Gintoki. Man up. This is no time to get weak on the knees. You know you did something wrong, you know your words have hurt her so just face her and apologize. Simple and straightforward. Nothing to it,' he told himself.

When they stepped inside the dining area, they saw Otae arranging extra rice bowls and chopsticks on the table. She looked at them with a smile on her face. "Welcome Kagura-chan. What perfect timing. Shin-chan outdid himself in making this _nabe_ today so it would be a delicious free lunch."

"Wow! It looks and smells delicious, _Anego_," said Kagura, giving her a quick hug before sitting down by the table. "Shinpachi, you're the best cook ever."

"Nah. I'm not THAT good. It's just _nabe_," said Shinpachi getting a bit red on the face. "Oh don't be so humble, Shin-chan. You cook the best _nabe_. Right Kagura-chan?" said Otae. "Uh-huh," agreed Kagura, who was already stuffing her face with _nabe_ and rice.

Gintoki felt ill-at-ease. Eventhough, Otae greeted them warmly, he can't shake the feeling that she wasn't too keen at having him around. He was still looking at her talking animatedly with Kagura when Shinpachi called out to him. "_Hora_, Gin-san, why are you still standing there? If you don't sit down and grab a rice bowl, Kagura-chan will eat up all your share," said Shinpachi.

He took his sit and tried hard to act normal. "_Oi, oi,_ Kagura-chan. Why don't you slow down? Real ladies have manners, you know. They should chew their food slowly and meditatively," he joked as Shinpachi handed him a rice bowl.

At this, Otae gave him a sharp glance. It was taking all her self-control to act normal and not unleash hell on Gintoki. She reminded herself that he's a stranger to her, ergo he no longer exist. "Kagura-chan, don't let anyone and I mean, anyone, especially people who are insensitive and inconsiderate of other people's feelings, to tell you what you should be in life. If you don't want to be a lady. So what? You can chew your food and eat them however you want. Isn't that right, Shin-chan?"

"Huh?" Shinpachi was caught off guard as he busily chewed his vegetables. "I guess, the _nabe_ can be eaten any way you want it."

"Yes, you can eat any way you want just as long as you've got the confidence in yourself. If you have that confidence, you can be whatever you want Kagura. You don't need any popularity poll to measure your worth, isn't that right, Shinpachi?" said Gintoki in answer to Otae's subtle challenge. He caught a glimpse of her giving him a morbid look while he was sipping _nabe_ soup out of his bowl. And he couldn't help feel a bit amused at winning Round 1.

"Huh?" Shinpachi was puzzled. 'Aren't they talking about _nabe_?' Somehow he could feel the heat rising and the boiling _nabe_ in front of him made it hard to pinpoint where it was coming from. "I'm sure my _nabe_ would win a popularity poll?" he said jokingly. "Right, Kagura-chan?"

Kagura, who was also busy eating her share of _nabe_, nodded. "I'll definitely vote for your _nabe,_ Shinpachi."

Meanwhile, Otae was silently seething inside. Gintoki had brought up a very sensitive subject and she desperately wanted to dump the boiling pot on his head. But she willed herself to remain calm and collected. She must win the second round and make him suffer.

"_Ara_, Shin-chan. That's not good. Don't join your _nabe_ in a popularity contest. It will just corrupt your _nabe's_ purity. And you, too, Kagura-chan, be very careful about such things because I know some people who are on top of the poll and it got to their heads and made them such arrogant, stinking bastards with no soul whatsoever," she said, eyes slitting with hate as she gave Gintoki a quick glance. "You are both dear to me and I don't want you two to end up that way."

Gintoki felt that one. If looks could kill, he would have been dead. He shivered a little as he thoughtfully ate his _nabe_.

"Yeah, some of these people are such heartless and cruel bastards," agreed Kagura. "They say mean things and look down on people who are not at the top as if they poop gold. They should be taken out and shot. Or at least, castrated and shot!"

'Damn you, Kagura. Why do you have to add fuel to the fire? I will slap you upside the head if you don't stop it,' thought Gintoki. He had a feeling this whole conversation would eventually make matters worse for him and his apology to Otae.

"_Maa...maa_, Kagura-chan. You don't need to be violent. We're just talking about _nabe_ right?" said Shinpachi, trying to steer the conversation away from dangerous thoughts. Earlier, he caught sight of his older sister giving Gintoki the death look that led him to believe that both may have some sort of misunderstanding going on. He had to dissipate the tension between them quickly or there will be hell to pay.

All four grew silent as if an angel just passed. Each one was preoccupied with his or her own thoughts. Kagura was thinking of how many bowls she could still eat. Otae was eating stiffly and automatically while her gaze was fixed on the steam coming out of the boiling pot. Gintoki was chewing his food lazily but would occasionally give Otae a sideway glance. Meanwhile, Shinpachi was trying to act normal but he was getting uncomfortable at the rising tension between the two. He had to do something.

"Hey there's still a lot of _nabe_ for everyone to share," he said cheerfully. "Let's enjoy them while they last. You'll never know we might not have _nabe_ for weeks or months. So it would be a good idea to eat your fill and savor every moment of it with friends."

Everyone looked at him as if he was a science experiment. But it was Kagura who broke the silence first. "_Uwa_...that's too freaking corny, Shinpachi. It's just _nabe_." And she laughed.

Otae laughed, too. "Oh my, Shin-chan, I didn't know you are that sentimental about your _nabe_."

"_Aneue_, you don't have to be so blunt," Shinpachi said, now feeling really embarrassed about what he said earlier.

"We should call you, Shinpachi, the _nabe_ lover," Gintoki teased.

"Gin-chan, now that one is corny," he said, shaking his head. The tension eased up a little and he knew he had to keep it down low. "Oh I forgot the tea. Let me get it for you guys."

"Shin-chan, let me do it. You've done enough cooking for today," Otae offered, getting up.

"_Aneue_, just stay there. Kagura-chan can help me fix it. You don't have to worry about it, just sit there and relax," he reassured her. He gave Kagura the look but she didn't get it. "Shin-chan, I don't want to fix tea. I'm still thinking of eating more _nabe_," said Kagura.

"Come on, Kagura-chan. You can help me boil water. The _nabe_ will still be there when we get back," Shinpachi quickly took her arm and half-dragged her to the doorway. When they reached the threshold, he quickly closed the door behind him and let go of Kagura's arm. They were both silent for a minute until Kagura spoke first.

"_Ne_, Shinpachi, are you sure those two are going to be alright in there?" she asked worriedly.

Shinpachi decided not to answer her right away. He busied himself with making the tea. He measured the green tea leaves mindfully as if trying to choose his words carefully. "I'm sure whatever misunderstanding that has happened between them, they can work it out themselves. We just have to give them a little time to lighten up and talk, you know."

He got boiling water and poured it in the teapot and waited for it to steep. He looked at the doorway and wondered how are things going with both Gintoki and his sister. "I musn't feel anxious. They're both adults. I know they can work this thing out."

_To be continued..._


	5. Chapter 5

In celebration of Gintama, the anime series, coming back this month, I've found motivation to update this fanfic. Woohoo! Oh things are getting heated and it's definitely not the _nabe_. (^_~) Enjoy! Thank you for the reviews and for reading. *HAPPY GLOMPS AND SQUISHES*

The usual copyright disclaimer applies: Gintama is not mine, it belongs to Hideaki Sorachi.

* * *

Gintoki hated uncomfortable, awkward situations. In fact, he has a tendency to run away from them if he happen to find himself in the midst of said predicament. It's not like he's afraid or anything, it's just that he thinks he is socially incapable of handling these things properly. There were times he tried to laugh his way out of said situations but ended up making things worse. In other times, he tried to ignore these things completely but ended up hurting the people involved. So he would much rather not face them at all. Or better yet, avoid getting in such situations in the first place.

But today at the _Kudokan dojo_, he finds himself in a very awkward situation indeed. For there in the Shimura dining room, with Shinpachi's _nabe_ boiling on the table, he was alone with Otae, the source of his guilt and trepidation. And it was taking all his will power to stop his body from high tailing it out of there. Only his guilty conscience kept him rooted to the spot as he casually eat his bowl of _nabe_.

'Man, why would Shinpachi and Kagura chose to make tea all of a sudden and leave me here alone with Otae-san,' he thought to himself as he stole a glance at the young woman sitting across him, her face clouded by the steam from the boiling _nabe_. 'Tch...I don't know what to say. I've been rehearsing my apology as Kagura and I walked over here but now I'm drawing a blank. Shit,' the white-haired samurai thought desperately. _'Kami-sama_, what the hell should I say.'

Otae looked at him for a second just as he was glancing at her. Their eyes met but she quickly averted hers and continued eating her food silently. Gintoki couldn't tell if she was mad or just ignoring him. Her poker face wasn't giving anything away. But he was sure that she was angry with him. If she wasn't, she would have clobbered him by now. 'But she's giving me the silent treatment. That means she's seriously pissed at me about last night,' he said to himself. 'Come on, Gintoki, speak up. Be the man. Just say sorry already and leave it at that.'

He gathered his courage together and swallowed his food hard, "_Ano_, Otae-san, about last night..." he said, not looking at her directly.

"Ah Sakata-san, I hope you're enjoying your_ nabe_. It's quite tasty, isn't it? Shin-chan outdid himself, don't you think so?" Otae suddenly said, beaming and all smiles.

"Ah...er...yes, it's really delicious," Gintoki said, confused at Otae's change in demeanor.

"Here, have some more meat and vegetables, Sakata-san," said Otae, offering him the serving spoon. "There's more where that came from. Shin-chan made so much that we can't possibly eat them all."

"_Do...doomo_," the _yorozuya_ said as he sheepishly took the spoon and put a small helping of meat and vegetables in his bowl. 'Why does she keep calling me Sakata-san when she usually calls me Gin-san? Why is she being so formal with me all of a sudden? Could it be she's trying to distance herself from me? _Yabe_. This is quickly escalating.'

Otae went back to eating stoically. She really had the strong urge to dump the boiling _nabe_ on the naturally-permed samurai who insulted her last night, but she remained in control. She had to push her rage deep inside the recesses of her heart. 'He doesn't exist. He just happened to be my little brother's employer, that is all. He's nobody to me.' This was the mantra that she's been saying to herself ever since he joined them for lunch. 'Really, the nerve of this jerk coming here and ruining my day. I so want to strangle him right now!'

Gintoki saw what looked like a black aura surrounding Otae. '_Kami-sama_, she really does hate me. Damn it, I had better say my apology now or she'll never speak to me again.'

"Otae-san, I'm sorry about what I said last night. I really didn't mean it," he said without hesitation. "I was just..."

"_Ara_, I wonder what's taking Shin-chan and Kagura-chan so long to make tea?" Otae abruptly said, cutting Gintoki off. "It shouldn't take that much time to boil water and steep the tea leaves, right?"

"Hmmm, well the water should be at the right temperature. And you know, depending on the kind and quality of the tea, it may take 10 or 15 minutes to steep it thoroughly to give it that robust flavor," Gintoki replied thoughtfully, seemingly unaware of Otae's ploy to change the subject. 'Wait a minute, she did it again!'

_"Oi, iikagen ni shiro_. This is the second time you didn't let me finish what I have to say," Gintoki said between gritted teeth. He has had enough of Otae trying to evade him and not letting him apologize properly. "I'm trying to say sorry here and be over and done with, but you seemed to be not listening. Really, if it will make you feel better, why don't you just kick me in the face or dump this hot _nabe_ on my head. I would rather you do violent things to me than not listen or talk to me at all!"

Otae didn't flinch at Gintoki's outburst. She remained like a stone, staring at the _nabe_ pot. Usually, her old self would just give in to her violent tendencies to get this misunderstanding with Gintoki quickly and deftly resolved. After that, she would feel better and forget his transgression. But this time, her wounded pride was in the way and she could not simply forgive and forget. She would show Gintoki just how hurt she is by doing the exact opposite.

She turned to him and gave him her most sweetest smile and said, "Hmm...maybe I should go check on them. Kids these days seemed to be getting way too distracted to finish anything." She stood up and headed to the door.

"_Ah souka_. You're trying to runaway," said Gintoki in a mischievous tone as if to rile Otae up. "You don't want to talk about it anymore and just want to forget the whole thing, right? That's fine by me, Otae-SAMA. I won't mention it EVER again." He felt the sarcasm of the last words he said roll off his tongue, but it was too late to stop them from coming out of his mouth.

Otae stopped by the door, her back towards Gintoki. She didn't want to say anything to him but his words stung her. She clenched her fists tight, willing herself not to cry in anger. "You know what, it was my fault I brought up the character poll with you. And I may have overreacted and became illogical because of it. But this doesn't give you the right to insult me," she said, trying to keep her voice even and emotionless. "Thinking that it is enough to say 'sorry' to me and be over and done with wounds my pride even more. You know, it hurts a lot to find out how you truly see me - as someone uninteresting with no redeeming value whatsoever - so it's alright to just say 'sorry' to her and go on your merry way. Because as you said, I'm a flawed character and it's the only thing I deserve." Her voice quivered but she held it together. "Just the same, SAKATA-SAN, I thank you for taking care of Shin-chan and I hope you will continue to take care of him. As for me, I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore."

With that, Otae opened the door and went to the kitchen where Shinpachi and Kagura were brewing tea. Gintoki could hear her forced cheerful voice in the background but all he could think about was the last words she told him, _'As for me, I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore.'_ He felt something pricked at his heart as the words echoed in his mind. He now fully realized how hurt Otae really is. He didn't know he was such an insensitive bastard when he said those things to her last night. How could he unknowingly hurt her like this? Gintoki knotted his forehead. The headache came back in full force. 'Tch...I just made things worse between us!'

He wanted to get up and go after her. He wanted to seriously talk to her about the whole thing. He wanted to sit her down and explain to her how he really feels and how sincerely he wanted to patch things up with her. How he didn't want her to hate him or cut him off from her life. But how can he do it now? He just lost his confidence after she made it known to him how truly hurt she feels. He never felt so ashamed in his life. Earlier, he was thinking once he said his apology to her everything would go back to normal as if nothing happened. They would both be in good terms again and that was because a simple sorry was said. How stupid can he be? And now his guilt came back a hundredfold.

"Sorry for the wait, Gin-san," said Shinpachi as he entered carrying a cast iron teapot. "It took a while to boil the water and steep the special green tea. Right, Kagura-chan?"

But Kagura wasn't listening. She was looking intently at Gintoki as she reached for her bowl of _nabe_. "Gin-san, you look different. Like you have a sad aura about you. Did something happened?"

Gintoki quickly changed his gloomy face and said, "That's just your imagination, Kagura. Hey Shinpachi, what took you two so long to make tea? Geesh, my throat is parched. There's no water on the table so I was expecting the tea would come soon. Good thing I didn't choke on the _nabe_ while you two were gone. Hehe."

"_Gomen, gomen_," Shinpachi said, smiling as he poured tea for Gintoki. He had sense the same gloominess when they came in the room. His _aneue_ emitted the same feeling when she went into the kitchen earlier. While she talked with them animatedly, her eyes were distant and sad. And Shinpachi knew this only too well about his sister.

"Ah where is Otae-san?" Gintoki asked nonchalantly as he tried to look for her furtively. He honestly didn't know how he would face Otae after their encounter earlier. He imagined it would be more awkward than he could bear and he would most likely make up an excuse to leave immediately. With the huge amount of guilt and shame he was feeling at that moment, he really wouldn't be able to face her after that.

"_Anego_ said she has to meetup with her coworker and accompany her shopping," Kagura quickly said, still eyeing Gintoki with suspicion while eating her _nabe_. "So she left. What did you tell her Gin-san? Did you two have a fight when we were gone?"

"_Maa, maa_, Kagura-chan. _Aneue_ did tell me earlier that she might go out today," said Shinpachi, trying to direct attention away from the obviously sullen Gintoki. His suspicion was correct, his sister and Gintoki had a misunderstanding. And by the looks of it, they didn't reach a resolution. Both seemed unwilling to come out in the open and show their true feelings to him and Kagura. He hated being treated like a kid but if they both want to be private about it, he really can't do anything. 'I think they needed more time to process whatever it is that came between them,' thought Shinpachi. 'I just hope it won't take too long.'

"_Oi, oi._ You seemed to be too quick at pointing a finger at me, Kagura. Who knows Otae-san left because you were eating too much _nabe_. Or maybe it's because Shinpachi took way too long to make the tea. Heh. Plus, we didn't have a fight. We actually had a nice conversation like we normally do while you two were goofing off, preparing the tea," said Gintoki, pretending to be annoyed. "Geesh, quit imagining things and just eat your _nabe_!"

But deep inside, Gintoki had a sinking feeling as he thought, 'Yeah we had a nice conversation alright. A nice disaster of a conversation.' He sighed inwardly. 'How could I ever make up to her after all this freaking mess that I did.'

_To be continued..._


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Minna, with bowed head, I say to you: _"Gomeiwaku o okakeshite, moshiwake gozaimashita!"_

I am truly sorry for taking years to update my Gintama fanfic. A lot has happened in real life that merited my full attention. But I really have no excuse. I just want to say, that I love my fanfics (Gintama better than Bleach) and I really hate abandoning them and leaving readers at a loss. Believe me, I know the feeling of just having things stop abruptly and completely (did you watch The Sopranos' ending, yeah, that feeling...hehe).

For a while, I really wanted to delete them on here but I couldn't do it. Then I realized that these stories have a little bit of my tama (魂) and kokoro (心) in them. They are a part of me as much as Japanese manga and anime have been for many years. So I decided to go back, re-read them over and over until they showed me how and where to start again.

So here's another chapter for your reading pleasure. Forgive me for all the inconsistencies and grammatical wrongdoings I've committed as I get into the groove of things. Lastly, I'm not promising anything. I may be able to finish this right away or I may not. But one thing I'll make sure of, I'll definitely give this fanfic closure.

Thank you so much for reading.

As usual, I don't own Gintama. Hideaki Sorachi-sensei does.

* * *

"He did what?!" Oryou shouted in disbelief. "Oh I hope you castrated him for that?! He deserved it."

"_Maa...maa_, Oryou-san, please keep your voice down," Otae whispered quite earnestly as she looked around the cafe in embarrassment. "You shouldn't be so loud. We don't want to disturb the other people here who are having their nice afternoon tea."

Oryou put a hand over her mouth, clearly realizing her overreaction. She nodded to the other staring customers in apology and drank her tea nervously.

"I'm sorry, Otae-san. I just couldn't believe that permed idiot said those things to you. It was way more than below the belt if you ask me," Oryou told Otae in a low voice.

Otae just nodded. She was still reeling from the tense exchange she had with Gintoki over lunch at the _Kudokan_ dojo. She wanted to stay and continue eating with the others but somehow she had lost her appetite and just wanted to get away. She simply couldn't bear being in the same room with Gintoki after everything that happened.

**(FLASHBACK: Kudokan dojo, lunchtime)_  
_**

_"Ara, Shin-chan, Kagura-chan, what's taking you two so long to brew that tea?" Otae said, closing the door behind her. _

_"Ah, aneue, I'm just making sure I was brewing this tea right," Shinpachi replied sheepishly. He looked at his sister, trying to gauge if the tension between her and Gintoki had finally dissipated. 'It seemed like she had gotten everything out of her system. Oh kamisama, I hope we won't find Gin-san unconscious on the floor with the nabe pot on his head,' he said to himself._

_"Shin-chan, we are not doing a tea ceremony here. Brewing tea at home should be done quickly and efficiently," Otae teased. "Because there are thirsty people waiting."_

_"Hai, hai," said Shinpachi, pouring the brewed tea in a cast iron teapot and arranging the tea cups on a tray. "Hora, Kagura-chan, help me bring these at the table."_

_"Anego, I told Shinpachi to hurry up. But he's taking his sweet time with the tea. I told him I still want to eat nabe but he said you and Gin-chan should be left alone for a while. Are you and Gin-chan having a fight?" Kagura asked innocently._

_The question caught Otae off-guard. She blinked once but regained her composure quickly, "Kagura-chan, you have nothing to worry about. Everything's fine now." She bared her arm as if to show her muscle and gave Kagura a knowing wink. "It's nothing I couldn't handle."_

_"Way to go, anego," said Kagura, triumphantly. "If men are being jerks, they deserve to be punched on the throat, yes?" Otae nodded, smiling._

_"Aneue, I think you shouldn't reinforce violent tendencies to an already violent child," Shinpachi said haplessly. "I hope Gin-san is still breathing."_

_"Shin-chan, how rude! Do you think I'm only capable of inflicting physical pain?" asked Otae, feigning hurt feelings. "I have you know that Gin-san is still alive and still eating all the nabe."_

_"Uwaa, I better get in there before he finishes all the meat," Kagura said and dashed off._

_"Oi, Kagura, you forgot to bring the tea. Didn't we agree that I brew the tea and you carry it," Shinpachi shouted at the yato. He looked at his sister, who suddenly fell quiet and distant. "Aneue, I didn't mean to pry or anything, it was just I could feel the tension between you and Gin-san earlier. So I thought you two could use a little time to get things sorted out by yourselves."_

_"Shin-chan, it's nothing you should worry about really. You know, Gin-san and I get into this word war. He's got a smart mouth, I got a smart mouth. Neither of us want to lose. But of course, I've got a quicker fist so he ends up the one shutting up," Otae said, letting out a small chuckle. "But don't worry, he recovers quickly enough."_

_Shinpachi let out a sigh of relief. "Souka, and here I thought it was really something serious." _

_"Oh my, would you look at the time," said Otae suddenly. "I better go. I'm late at meeting Oryou."_

_"Eh? Aneue, you're not finishing lunch with us?" Shinpachi asked, a bit surprised. _

_"I'm afraid not, Shin-chan. I'm sorry," Otae said apologetically. "Didn't I tell you earlier that I have plans after lunch time? I promised Oryou to go shopping with her. She's a bit depressed, you see, and asked me to accompany her for a much needed therapy. Gomen ne."_

_"Ah sou," said Shinpachi, a little bit deflated. He had hoped to spend more time with his big sister. _

_"You guys enjoy the nabe," Otae said as she put on her zori. "Leave the dishes in the sink. I'll wash them when I get back." As she head to the door, she turned and gave her brother the most sweetest and reassuring smile she could muster. "Shin-chan, thank you for cooking nabe for me. It was delicious. Ittekimasu!"_

_Shinpachi smiled so widely at what his big sister said that he missed the smallest hint of sadness in Otae's eyes. "Itterasshai, aneue!" _

_Otae never felt so guilty. She had just lied to both Shinpachi and Kagura. 'It can't be helped. I don't want to involve them in what happened to Gin-san and I. I'm the one who broke ties with him. So I'm the only one who should distance myself," she said to herself. 'Besides, he's a big part of their lives now. I don't want them to choose sides. They can still maintain a good relationship with him and they should, it's just that I won't be a part of that anymore.'_

_Somehow that last thought felt so heavy in her heart - he won't be a part of her life and she, not a part of his. There was a sense of finality in it, a definite ending. 'Is that even possible?' her mind asked, rubbing her forehead as if willing the question away._

_Otae walked aimlessly. She had no destination in mind. All she wanted was to get away and empty her mind of what happened. Or at least have someone to talk to for some outside perspective. She could use some help sorting these feelings out. _

_She took out her cellphone to call Oryou and hoped that she would be available to meet her._

**(END FLASHBACK)**

"Hey Otae-san...are you listening?" Oryou asked, worried about her friend.

"Yes...yes I am," Otae gave her a small smile as she sipped her tea thoughtfully.

"He really did a number on you huh?" Oryou bluntly said. "It's unusual for you to space out like this, plus you're smiling more than usual. Did what that guy said really affected you?"

Otae swallowed a lump in her throat and looked away. "It hurts...what he said...it really did," she said simply. She took a deep breath to steel herself as she gently twirl her tea cup. "But somehow, somewhere inside me thinks he is right. That, you know, I'm all those things and nothing more."

"Otae-san...stop it!" Oryou said emphatically, grabbing Otae by the collar. "Do you hear yourself right now? It's pathetic! The Otae-san I know doesn't care about any man's opinion of her - she's strong, confident, outspoken and the queen of all superbitches!"

Otae gave her a smile with eyes turning into a dangerous color, "If I liked being called a super queenbitch to my face, I'd have my father's dojo up and running by now. _Kon'aro_."

Oryou abruptly let go of Otae's collar, fearing the all-too-familiar ominous aura of the young brunette. She chided herself for her wrong choice of words at such a delicate time. "Ah, I'm sorry, Otae. I didn't mean that in a negative way. It's just that this isn't you at all. You're a brave woman. You don't take crap from anybody or any man for that matter."

Otae sighed. Her face changed from menacing to melancholy in an instant. At the back of her mind, she knew what was eating at her but she was afraid to admit it or even say it out loud. Why was it that Gin-san's words hurt her so much like this? If he was any other man, she would have put his lights out deftly and swiftly. Things would have gone back to normal. End of story.

"_Masaka_..." Oryou cut into her reverie. "Don't tell me you like Sakata-san?!"

Once again, Otae was caught off-guard. She blinked at Oryou. "What?! That's the most cruel joke you could possibly tell me right now, Oryou-san! I never..." she sipped her tea carefully, avoiding eye contact with her friend.

Oryou narrowed her eyes. "Hmmm...you know what I think. This goes beyond the character poll. I mean, you like this guy and his words meant a lot to you. Why else would you be moping around like this? If that lazy yorozuya is any other man, you would have dealt with him right away. He would probably be in the hospital for insulting you. But here you are, sipping tea and feeling depressed about it."

"Depressed?! Me?! Far from it," Otae cried incredulously, annoyance and anger now etched all over her face as she quietly smashed the dainty teacup in her hand. "Don't even think for a second I had fallen for that lousy bastard. You can't even begin to imagine how I would like to smash that good-for-nothing perm-head to the ground!"

"Otae-san, don't hurt yourself!" warned Oryou when she saw her friend singlehandedly strangle the teacup. "_Sumimasen_...can we have another teacup here, please?" she called out to the waiter.

"I think the tea is too hot for the cup, it just broke on its own," Otae shyly told the waiter as she handed the pieces back to him. The waiter just nodded fearfully. He gingerly placed a new teacup on the table and shakily poured tea for Otae.

"So...why didn't you?" asked Oryou, feeling a little bit braver now that Otae seemed to be revealing something vulnerable and sacred. Otae looked at her dumbfounded.

"So why didn't you smash the yorozuya to the ground like you usually do?" Oryou repeated. She genuinely wanted to know.

Otae took a sip from her new cup. "Well, that's what was expected of me, right? I'm Otae, the strong woman, who doesn't take crap from anybody," she paused and took a sip again. "If you give her crap, she'll definitely clobber you twofold. That's how predictable she is."

She squared her shoulders as she looked at Oryou directly. "Well, I don't want to be predictable anymore. I want to break free from this _tsukommi_ mode. So I completely did the opposite."

"You didn't do anything to him?" asked Oryou, confused. "So you just gave him a cold shoulder or something?"

"More like I had cut all ties with him," Otae said proudly. "From now on, he doesn't exist to me."

"But Otae, he's your brother's employer. You can't deny that both of you will always be connected somehow," pointed out Oryou. "I mean, is it even possible to treat someone as if he doesn't exist when your little brother brings him to your dojo every so often?"

Otae unconsciously rubbed her forehead as she heard Oryou echoed what was on her mind earlier. "I don't know. I'll find a way. I'm just so angry at what he said about me and disappointed at him. So disappointed that I wished I never met him at all."

"Otae-san..." Oryou said gently, realizing her friend's grave predicament.

"I want to forgive and forget. But this thing that happened between us has become personal. That idiot did something so profoundly hurtful that I can't bring myself to forgive him. I mean I know from the start he's mean and insulting, but to actually hear those words coming from him hit me like a ton of bricks," Otae said with a downcast look. "My pride was wounded. I felt summarily dismissed."

"Did he try to apologize at all? Perhaps, you should give him a chance to..." Oryou suggested helpfully.

"He did. But it was a lame-ass attempt at saying sorry, which only added to the pile of insults he just gave me," said Otae flatly. She seethed at remembering their conversation over lunch earlier. "Could you believe the gall of that guy, he just wanted to 'say sorry' and be done with it like I was the one who inconvenienced him. Other decent people would put maximum effort in apologizing properly. But him, he acted like I should be able to go back to normal after his apology!"

Oryou shook her head in disgust. "Men are jerks. They always think that everything can be fixed simply so they can move on. They don't care about the underlying misery and the lingering ill effects that we suffer because of their bullheaded actions. Well, it can't be helped. Most of their blood flows down their crotches instead of going to their brains."

Otae suddenly laughed at her friend's seemingly innocent statement. "Oryou, you summed it up quite nicely." Her friend snickered mischievously. "Yeah, men have crotches for brains!"

Oryou nodded in agreement. She was a bit relieved that her friend can have a little respite from the things that were bothering her. "_Ne_, Otae-san, why don't we do some window shopping to get your mind off things. You've been thinking too hard about your fight with Sakata-san, you need a break!"

Otae released one deep sigh and stretched her arms. Although nothing had been resolved with her talk with Oryou, she felt a little lighter and less gloomy. "That's a good idea. I'm Otae, after all. I don't take crap from anybody especially from a man who has perms and crotches for a brain! Let's go, Oryou-san."

She looked out the busy street where everything continued to be normal and ordinary. 'Yeah, I shouldn't over think things. I've made up my mind. Knowing that idiot, he wouldn't care at all. I bet he's carrying on as usual as if nothing happened," she caught herself thinking. She shook her head slightly and held it up high. 'Well then, good riddance!'

_To be continued..._


	7. Chapter 7

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Thank you to each one of you who took the time to post a review/reaction to what's happening in the story so far. I'm glad the story illicit a response, a feeling - love or hate, like or dislike, even a small urge to strangle this author for taking so freaking long to update! (hehe). Because that's a small part of my goal in writing fan fiction (not the strangling part, okay?!). But I'm really here mostly for selfish reasons - to see my ship sail in the right direction because the original gorilla-author is *never* gonna go that way. If you're confused as to what I'm talking about, let me spell it out clearly - I ship Otae with Gintoki. And so, I will write them in couple-type situations as much as I can. And I'm not ashamed to say that it's all for my own satisfaction. I'm biased to this ship to the core, so please bear that in mind when you're reading the story.

With that out of the way, let me respond to a review by Guest in particular. (From here on out, I will address you, Guest. So please read carefully). I understand where you are coming from. Really, I do. It seems in this story Gintoki is getting the short end of the stick and Otae is being given an excuse to be a bitch while she doesn't have the right to since she brought this unto herself in the first place. Did I read the meaning of your review, right? Anyway, I don't usually *explain* what I write in fan fiction. But to help you put things in proper perspective, I will say that things are NOT what they seemed in this story. Now that's a hint right there. If you try to read between the lines, you'll notice it, too. OR I may just be trolling you. WAHAHAHAHA!

But really, this fan fiction is based on the Gintama universe - a convoluted mess of a universe filled with complicated, heartfelt, wacky, troll-mongering, stress-inducing, poop-constipating, lewd but adorable, extremely lunatic characters we love as fans. So IMHO, to write my Gintama fan fics in a predictable, neatly packaged and balanced POV is completely disrespectful to the awesome work of the original gorilla-author himself. So unfortunately or fortunately (depending on how readers look at it), things will stay as joyously biased and deliciously messed-up around here.

So Guest, I would love for you to continue reading it. But if, for some reason, you can't take the way things are going in this fanfic, then by all means, don't read it, because I can assure you, YOU HAVEN'T SEEN NOTHING YET. *evil grin* On a serious note, thank you for the review, I really appreciate it. :)

* * *

But Gintoki cared. In fact, he cared a lot because if he didn't, he wouldn't keep replaying the tense exchange he had with Otae. He absentmindedly picked his nose as he walked. 'How the hell did it go that way?'

Then Otae's words came into his thoughts, "I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore." 'Tch...she's definitely pissed off at me...no...more like she really hates my guts.' He let out a small sigh, 'What the hell am I going to do? How in this goddamn world could I get out of this mess now? Tch..._mendokuse na...'_

"Gin-chan, did you eat too much _nabe_? You looked like a walking dead. Don't tell me you're having indigestion and needed to go to the bathroom, yes?" Kagura said, without turning to him.

He glanced at the young girl, still expressionless. "Oi, Kagura, don't be the boss of my bowel movement. I'm just feeling sluggish after all that food. You know how it is when you eat a lot you tend to want to sleep after. That's what I'm feeling right now. I just want to take a nap," he retorted.

"Hmmm...but you seemed to be thinking hard about something, yes?" Kagura persisted as she ruffled Sadaharu's fur. "And that's something you don't do often because it hurts your head, yes?"

"What?! You're the boss of my brain now?" Gintoki snapped back, clearly getting annoyed.

"Gin-chan, are you and _anego_ having a fight?" she asked, looking at Gintoki directly.

"You asked me about that earlier and I gave you the answer, right?" monotoned Gintoki. Like hell he would freely discuss what happened to him and Otae with Kagura. He didn't want her and Shinpachi to get involved in an adults only fight.

"I know. But _anego_ left without finishing lunch with us, which is not like her, yes?" said Kagura, knotting her eyebrows as she recalled how Otae looked earlier at lunch. "And you...you seemed to be preoccupied about something. Is everything all right between you two?"

"Kagura, there's nothing to worry about. Everything's fine. You're the one who's over thinking stuffs. That's not good, you know, thinking too much might damage your brain," Gintoki replied. "Besides, Otae told me she was leaving early and that we should enjoy eating all the _nabe_. So we separated in good terms, like we always do."

Kagura suddenly stopped on her tracks, making Gintoki stopped abruptly to avoid bumping into her. "Gin-chan, I don't want you and _anego_ to be fighting. It's not good for our family, yes? Parents having serious disagreements are not good for the children. Sometimes, the fighting even leads to divorce."

Gintoki ran his fingers through his permed white hair. "Kagura, you've been watching too many daytime soap operas haven't you? What's up with this parents and divorce thing? First of all, Otae-san and I are not your parents. Second, we're not married so divorce is impossible. Third, there is no disagreement between us," he said with a straight face. But with the last one, he clearly lied to his teeth.

Kagura wasn't convinced, however. She rode on Sadaharu's back and led him to turn around toward Gintoki. "That's what parents usually say. Then the next thing you know, you'll be packing your bags and leaving, while the other parent cries. Then, the children will be twerking while wearing vulgar bikinis. Waah...I don't want to end up in a broken home, yes?"

"Then I'll just set you up for adoption," Gintoki shouted. "You can have new parents who will care for you better and make you brush your teeth everyday...twice." He was growing frustrated. This time, he can't wrap his head around Kagura's logic. 'Tch...have I come full circle? Why do I feel this is some kind of dejavu?' he thought.

"Fine!" said Kagura, getting equally irritated at Gintoki's denseness. "My adoptive parents would most likely be ten times better than you and they would most likely feed me better food than bread and rice everyday. Let's go, Sadaharu."

But before letting Sadaharu run off, she turned around again and shouted, "You had better apologize to _anego_ properly. Or else, there will be two people who would never forgive you."

Gintoki placed his hand on his forehead, the nagging headache was back in full force. "Tch...that's easier said than done, especially when the person you're trying to apologize to doesn't want to have anything to do with you anymore," he whispered to himself. "Shit, I need something sweet to ease this damn headache."

He stopped at a _dango_ shop and ordered a few skewers of _yango dango_. He sighed. "A parfait would have been nice but I've got no money for such expensive stuff. But these _dango_ would do in a pinch."

"Gintoki, if you don't keep away from sweets, you'll die of diabetes," said someone sitting on a bench behind him. Gintoki lazily eyed the source of the voice.

"Oi Zura, are you the boss of my sweet tooth now? I don't need you policing my one and only pleasure in life," he said, continuing to munch on skewered _dango_. "Fancy seeing you here out in the open. Aren't you supposed to be lying low since, you know, you're plotting the Bakufu's demise?"

"HAHAHAHA...Gintoki, Zura _janai_..." Katsura began to say but Gintoki cut him off. "I know, I know...Katsura _da_. Man, can't you throw away that line already. The manga has been running for 10 years and for 10 years you've been saying it. Geesh, it's no longer a cliche, it's a relic from the past - the kind you find in archeological digs."

"I can't help it if it's the gorilla-author's favorite. But sometimes, he actually mixes things up a bit to prevent it from being old like leader _da_, pine tree _da_, Captain Katsura _da_, Zurako _da_, Ill Smith _da_, etc. etc. _da_. Anyway, it is what it is, Gintoki. Isn't that right, Elizabeth?"

"Right, leader!" said Elizabeth's sign.

"Gintoki, I sensed that something seems to be bothering you today." Katsura said gravely. "You seemed to be off your usual self. Has something happened?"

"Zura since when did you become an _esper_?" mumbled Gintoki as he chews several _dango_ in his mouth. "I'm just minding my own business here when you interrupted my enjoyment. There's a reason why I eat my _dango_ alone, so that I won't have to answer pain in the ass questions from pain in the asses like you."

"Gintoki, we've been friends for a long time. Believe me when I say I can sense even the smallest of change in you." He gave the white haired samurai a quick glance. "For instance, you used to eat _dango_ off a skewer one at a time, but now you don't even notice that you're obliviously eating the skewers as well," Katsura pointed out.

"Fuwaahhh...what the hell?! Why didn't you tell me this before?! I could have choked on wood splinters! _Teme_!" Gintoki cried, quickly cleaning out his mouth. "Some kind of friend you are, just sitting there and watching me kill myself with skewers!"

"Hey, for all I know you want to commit _seppuku_ with skewers. As your friend, it is my duty to sit quietly by your side and bear witness to your last act on this Earth," Katsura reasoned out as he eat a non-skewered _dango._

"That's not a friend at all, you bastard. That's more like a prison warden, making sure the death row inmate dies swiftly and efficiently ," Gintoki said, swiping some _dango_ off of Elizabeth's plate.

'Hey! No fair!' said Elizabeth's sign. He stood up from the bench and moved away from Gintoki, carrying his plate with him. 'Go eat your sweet skewers! Glutton!'

"Gintoki, don't try to change the subject. Is there something bothering you? Eating away at your soul, making you think disturbing thoughts and wondering why that something didn't go your way?" asked Katsura, almost hitting the bull's eye.

Gintoki fell silent and reverted back to his nonchalant self. "_Betsu-ni._..it's just something unnecessary I have to deal with. Nothing I couldn't handle."

"How naive. Don't you know love itself is made up of unnecessary things? An unnecessary flutter of the heart, an unnecessary sense of insecurity, unnecessary struggling, and unnecessary endings," Katsura said seriously. "But who would ever claim they were all unnecessary? No, everything in this life is gained by those so-called unnecessary things."

Gintoki eyed his childhood friend. He just couldn't believe Katsura was making sense for once. "Zura, when did you become an expert at love? As far as I know you haven't encountered love, even one that's unnecessary. You're better off spouting those words in the tranny bar, Zurako would probably gain unnecessary attention over there..."

"_Mou ii_...if you don't want to talk about it that much then I won't mention it again, _teme_," said Katsura, irked at Gintoki's stubborn facade. "As far as I'm concerned you can split your skull open with your _bokuto_ or skewer your brain and grill it, see if I care. I'm just making conversation."

Gintoki was silent for a while. He admitted he had a tendency to push away the very people who are trying to help him. With Katsura's words, he realized his friends had done countless unnecessary things for him. Some were headache-inducing, but most, if not all, were soul-warming. And he felt guilty at times for failing to recognize their effort. He knew now that those 'unnecessary things' were the very foundation his friendships were built on. He let out an irritated grunt, the best he could do at an apology to Katsura.

"Okay, how about this for a conversation: I have a friend who has a friend of a friend who did something terrible to another friend. This friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend said terrible things to this other friend who got hurt. This friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend realized this and tried to apologize but the other friend was so hurt that he/she didn't want to be friends with this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend anymore."

"Wait a minute, are we playing six degrees of separation?" Katsura looked at him, very interested. "I'm good at that game. So you're saying that you're a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend of this person? So where does that leave me? Ah, since I'm one of your friends, I can be a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-..."

WHACK!

"_Teme_! I thought we were having a conversation here?" Gintoki shouted at the fallen Katsura. "What's six degrees of separation got to do with what I'm telling you?! Are you even listening?"

"Of course, I'm listening," Katsura recovered quickly. "I should listen because somewhere along those friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend line, I could be related to Kevin Bacon."

"You could be a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-a-son-of-a-bitch for all I care!" said Gintoki, vein popping on his forehead. He was beginning to think it was a bad idea starting this conversation with Katsura in the first place. He should have known that things would go nowhere.

"So? Is this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend of yours apologized again?" Katsura suddenly asked, not looking at him.

Gintoki was taken aback by the simple question. He scrambled for an answer: "Ah...um...no. He/she didn't even get a chance to say sorry the first time because the other friend hates his/her guts."

"So this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend of yours just gave up?" asked Katsura again. "He/she didn't attempt at another apology?"

Gintoki coughed. "Well, the other friend considers this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend doesn't exist anymore. He/she has been catapulted to the position of stranger. So how can he/she apologize again?"

This time, it was Katsura who heaved a deep sigh. "Gintoki, a friend will always be a friend, no matter if the other friend has thrown him out of the circle of friendship. If your friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend did something to hurt that other friend, he should apologize no matter what. It may not mend the friendship, but at least both of you can go on your own way without a lifetime of regrets."

"Er...you do know that we're not talking about me, right?" said Gintoki, nervously. "I mean, this is about my friend who has a friend of a friend, right? Right?!"

"_Ochitsuite_, Gintoki. I know what you mean. There's no need to explain," reassured Katsura, folding his arms to show he knew what he was talking about.

Gintoki scratched the back of his head. "But this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend wants to mend the friendship. He/she doesn't want to lose this other friend even if this other friend really hates him/her. I mean he/she is willing to atone for his/her mistake in any way he/she can."

"Gintoki, should we just dispense of the he-slash-she and just use a single pronoun? It feels like my head is being slashed in two. Here let me re-word what you said. So this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend, that's you, wants to mend the friendship," Katsura carefully surmised, a hand placed on his chin as if in deep thought. "You don't want to lose this other friend, which is a her, even if she really hates you. And that you are willing to atone for your mistake in any way you can. Now isn't that much simpler?"

WHACK!

"_Teme_! How is that simpler? You just involved me in it when I told you it's not about me! How about I slash your head with a skewer?!" screamed Gintoki, obviously agitated at the prospect of being found out. "And how did you come to the conclusion that the other friend is a woman? How? Tell me!"

"It's because you never acted this way with me," Katsura said simply. "And I don't mean that in a yaoi sense, okay? I mean, I'm one of your long time friends and you throw insults upon insults at me, do you ever feel guilty? No. You just go on being you as usual. Not really caring whether I got offended or not. But this..." he made a sweeping gesture by Gintoki's face. "This is the first time I see you like this, so it's elementary my dear Watson, that it's about a woman you care about. Am I right?"

Gintoki remained silent, he had no words of comeback for what Katsura nailed on the head. "Shut up, Zura," was all he managed to say under his breath. He sat down and ate Katsura's remaining non-skewered _dango_ thoughtfully.

Katsura didn't say another word as well. He hated using this tactic but Gintoki left him no choice. He knew his longtime comrade won't easily admit to anything, even to him. Now he could clearly see Gintoki's confusing predicament. He sighed and closed his eyes.

"Well then, this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend should _ayamare_ over and over again until that friend softens up and forgive him/her. I don't know this other friend but I'm sure he/she is not too heartless to not realize how much effort this friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend of yours is putting to make amends," said Katsura.

They were silent for a while, both thinking their own thoughts. "Tch..._mendokuse_..." Gintoki finally said after a few minutes.

"Listen, Gintoki. If you really feel in your heart that this friendship is worth saving, you must be willing to do many unnecessary, bothersome things. The other friend might not like it, he/she might push you away but you must persevere until your voice breaks down the wall that came between you to gain him/her back," Katsura said with finality. He stood up to walk away. "I'm sure that other friend is saddened by the whole situation, too, and is just waiting for a sincere and proper apology."

"Oi Zura, I'm not the one we're talking about here, okay!?" shouted Gintoki desperately. "I'm not in this sad situation, okay?!"

"Relax, Gintoki. I understand. I'm your friend, after all," said Katsura, his back turned away from Gintoki. "If I were in the same boat, I'm sure you'll urge me to apologize over and over to..." he looked back at Gintoki and gave him a wink. "...to...Kevin Bacon, right?"

"You...you Zura bastard!" screamed Gintoki in frustration. "You were only thinking about Kevin Bacon all this time we were having this conversation, weren't you? Weren't you?!"

But Katsura just continued walking away while laughing out loud. Elizabeth followed behind him. He showed a sign to Gintoki that said: "Gin-san, _ganbarre_!"

"Shit, I think I just got fucking trolled," Gintoki hung his head in resignation. "_Ayamare_? I didn't even get to first base with that one."

_To be continued..._

* * *

**JUST IN CASE:**

mendokuse - troublesome, bothersome

ochitsuite - calm down

esper - psychic (as in E.S.P.-er - extrasensory perception user)

ayamare - to apologize

ganbarre - to hang in there

betsu ni - nothing in particular

teme - bastard

dango - Japanese sweets made from rice flour; yango dango - sweetened red bean paste dango


End file.
